Monday, June 9, 2008

FHE TP Training

For Family Home Evening we set out on a mission.
We had to do some TP training.

First off: Shhh! Be sneaky.

Second: It's critical to learn proper technique--Don't let anything show!

Of course, you have to teach them while they're young.

Come prepared. Don't run out of supplies.

And...Don't forget the cars.

Okay...

Confessions of our foiled plan...

We set some pretty lofty goals for ourselves but, unfortunately, our night was filled with some setbacks. First, we didn't all leave together. I had to get gas in my car and the boys were sent to get TP. Our goal was to meet up for our "professional" rendevous. Brandon was put in charge of getting supplies. When we met up with him, we realized he bought paper towels. What?! Paper towels?! What?! How?! What?! His reply, "It looked like toilet paper." Okay, whatever. Additionally, when I looked at the small quantity he brought I inquired why there wasn't more. Again, there was an excuse,"Dad only gave me $10." What?! (Obviously, Dad doesn't shop very often.) $10?! What?! That's it?! Boy, I am failing my family something aweful. It's then I realize I need to do some major training, even to my husband. Well, we tried to make the most of what we had. Leaving was not an option!

But what was worse, we got caught!!! A neighbor down the street came out and had an attitude with our boys. This happened before we (me, dad, and the babies) got there. The alarmed neighbor didn't believe that they were friends and doing it in "fun" and "friendship" so he knocked on the door of our victims and had them come outside. What?! How more wrong can a good TP go? The dad said to go ahead and finish the job before his daughter got home (one of the "jokers" who did our house). Good sport but, hey, come on! Serves me right for complaining about my culprits and their poor job. It just makes me sick.

15 comments:

Liz Ann said...

Oh man, did that song just say booger flinging? How funny!

Anyways, y'all suck. I guess y'all did OK with what you had. But y'all sure did have some poor planning. And not to mention some nosy annoying neighbors. What punks. Some people just don't know how to have fun. Y'all should go back and egg her house.

Kim said...

That's hilarious! Can't wait to find out what she thought when she got home. By the way, they said their pitiful job was due to the fact that they thought they heard you guys coming outside, so they took off. Better watch out, you just might have a TP war on your hands!!! I have a feeling they might be back to prove they really aren't that lame. ;)

Tara said...

Ha! Ha! That stinks you had so many setbacks but I love to see that your family is getting good training for FHE!

Anonymous said...

For once, I can say glad you're in Vegas, cause I sure wouldn't want to clean my yard in our 100 degree plus weather in South Carolina!! ha,ha.....Where's Gabriel? Anyway, looks like ya'll are having fun! What are ya'll doing for Frankie's graduation? We're all sooo proud of him.....
Love to all, Grandma Evelyn

Marina said...

Grandma, Gabriel wouldn't let me take his picture. And, yes, I love this dry air. It's so much nicer than the humidity in SC. Y'all are probably at 60-70%, huh?

Boren Family said...

Okay you might be my favorite person!!!! I love TP-ing! And yes you have to do it right. I grew up in the ghetto and everyone had big trees and you could have some serious fun with that. I hope I can teach my kids as well as you have!!! :)

Anonymous said...

y'all sure do know how to have fun don't ya!

Anonymous said...

Ok, first of all.....you SUCK!! Don't sit there and try and blame that on your "surroundings" or "poor planning." What is with blanketing the front yard with paper towels? You should have taken that JUMBO size "toilette paper" and started in the trees!! I'm sad to say, but you obviously have failed as a parent! LOL ;-)

I think it's time to move on to the next lesson with your kids...."Throwing flaming bags of poo!" Where to find a target...? Oh, I know, why don't you start with that pesky neighbor down the street! LOL You already have access to the nastiest poo available. Either Lil' Frankie's or Kela's...take your pick! Ha Ha Ha

Ok, but seriously, they ARE NASTY!!! :-)

Anyway, hang your head in shame and then get back out there and redeem yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We're rootin' for you girl!

PS Gabriel probably wouldn't let you take his picture because of his goofy head gear! :-P That one was for you, Gabriel...love ya!

House of Squitty said...

Wow, the plan did fail miserably but at least you continued on and showed that family some love! And, I don't know what slowing down is! My day off is probably the equivalent of running a marathon. :)

Angel said...

Mary, you are a trip! Poor Gabriel! I agree, use Frankie's poop. We are always refering to him when someone lets a nasty one rip!

Anonymous said...

Hey Wolfepack!!!

Love the website! Especially the Song of the South....

Great idea for snow and I thought paper towels would be better anyway if you have a lot to cover...tell Brandon he had the right idea in Sister Jenkins book!!!(yes I am Sister Jenkins again...whew!!)

Parris misses ya'll.

Take care and keep the blog going!

Marina you never cease to amaze me.

Lydia

Anonymous said...

OK, this is to all of you who are talking about Frankie's poo! I guess ya'lls poo is the most sweet smelling rose scented poo, right? Yeah, right......I guess there is no secret who I am, Frankie's grandma, ha,ha......
CONGRATULATIONS, GRADUATE!!!!!!!!

Liz Ann said...

Can we start a war on your page, to draw attention away from mine for a second. My page is on fire. It needs to cool down.

Ok, Frankie's poo is the worst. Do you not remember when the doctors even claimed it to be the most foul smelling crap he has ever smelt. He knocked out all the people on his whole floor. Weewwhh...can you say RANK-OLA!!! Nobody has anything on him

Anonymous said...

Hi Lizzie!
No, I don't remember, all I remember was how beautiful he was!
You'll get it one day when you are granny.....
How are your cute ones doing? I just had to rag ya'll a little, ha,ha.......
Take care, Evelyn

Liz Ann said...

We are all doing good.

We love Frankie, but you know we have to give him a hard time